by Rachel Lucas
I recently read an article with a different take on the so-called “War on Women.” The article is called the “War on Men,” and it notes that the feminist movement over time has caused men to increasingly steer clear of marriage and of raising a family. It further notes that women have become angry and have “been raised to think of men as the enemy.”
What’s curious is that these same arguments, that men are bad and women are victims, have remained unchanged from the women’s liberation movement back in the ‘70’s when I was coming of age. Nothing new here – in almost 40 years.
That’s what we were taught when I was in college – that we were oppressed and that men were the enemy. That we should keep our (father’s) names and hold fast to our identities, and that “a woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.” Well, I wanted to be a strong, modern woman and so I enrolled in the “Women’s Studies” program. We read about Mother Jones and Gloria Steinem, and books like “The Feminine Mystique.”
I didn’t even last an entire term. I found the subject matter boring and self-indulgent. All of the women seemed angry and frankly, unhappy – with men, with themselves, and with life. I was just starting out in my own life and I certainly didn’t want what they had. After two months of “studying women” I was cured!
In the midst of the misplaced anger that I found in “Women’s Studies” I discovered quite the opposite – that I loved being a woman; that I wanted someday to love a man as my husband, to take his name and to raise a family together.
A couple of years later, after a few adventures of my own, and at a time I least expected it, my husband-to-be walked into our small church, and soon, we fell in love. That was 32 years and three children ago, and, although I have done and accomplished many things in my life, I can say that my marriage and family are the jewels of my life and true gifts from God.
And yes, I took his name. Just as women have been doing for centuries. As traditional as that may seem, at that time in my life, it was really quite radical. As the feminist movement was just reaching its peak, all of my friends were still following the Pied Piper of feminism. But I was listening to a different drummer – a deeper reality, and the same truth echoed in the article I read – the solution to the so-called war on women, as well as the war on men:
Far from being victims, we women are never more powerful than when we are truly and fully what God made us to be!