Frustration at Oregon DEQ

Jeff Anderson

Jeff Anderson

by Jeff Anderson

The best laid plans.

My lunch hour was to be spent taking my car through DEQ to pass the magic emission test and get new tags. I read the instructions provided by DEQ on how to prepare for my test.

I had all the paperwork ready, I brushed my teeth, combed my hair, brought a blood & urine sample along with driver’s license, passport, proof of address, proof of insurance, registration, title, cash and a happy attitude….attitude is everything.

I was greeted by a cheerful lady as I drove up, she put me through my first quiz, which I passed and she directed me to Lane #3.

After waiting in line, watching cars getting probed up the tailpipe (I’m over 50 so I can sympathize) it was finally my turn.

I exited the car while the attendant plugged in the computer and inserted the tailpipe probe. After he chatted me up, he informed me that I FAILED.

Jeff Anderson_DEQ fail

DEQ fail!

I don’t take failure lightly; I have been studying for this. I had all my paperwork in line and I even took the car in for service, new tires and a full detail just prior to my visit. This is a good solid car, 46,000 miles that I’m going to sell next week. I thought I would be a good guy and get new tags to save the new owner the expense and hassle.

Jeff Anderson_car

Jeff’s car

The DEQ employee explained that the reason I failed was because I had the car serviced……apparently if you have your car serviced, tuned and cared for just prior to coming into DEQ it will fail because the computer doesn’t like it. I was advised to “drive around for 5 days and come back….everything should be fine.”

I hope that whoever came up with the idea of DEQ and implementing the ritual of the visits to pay for a tailpipe probe is rewarded with a beautiful vacation in which his room is infested with rabid bedbugs and e coli-ridden welcome treats.

  • Sorry for your car’s failure, Jeff. Don’t take it personally. I took my car into DEQ just this morning and it passed with flying colors. Luckily it hasn’t been in for service for a while! And they only charged me $21 for a service I didn’t want and didn’t need. Marvelous!

    • Stickemup Brown Sows

      How many DEQ units are measured in PERSimonies? Remember when checks were free and then charged up to what they are today…for a lot of nonsense.

  • Bob Clark

    The real concentration should be on diesel trucks, not so much gasoline powered passenger cars. If a cop sees a passenger car putting out blue smoke, maybe then the cop should have the ability to send the car and driver to DEQ emissions center. But otherwise, probably can do away with as other states have, emissions testing for newer gasoline powered passenger cars.

  • snkbyt

    Jeff, The test results I see are from your car sitting in line with the engine shut off and the converter cooled down. Usually the ‘not ready’s ‘ indicate it isn’t warmed up enough. If I was waiting in a DEQ line I’d have it running and revved to 1500-2000 RPM to keep the Cat hot. I’ve never had a test in Oregon but used to own a test station in Anchorage. We always ran the engine fast for about 3 minutes to make sure it’s hot and the computer sees ‘ready’. I didn’t see pollution fail but computer not ready or seeing it run enough. AND believe me having it serviced had nothing to do with it..ASE Master Tech.

  • thevillageidiot

    .02% is what VW was cheating on for particulate emissions. What good is DEQ or the EPA except to exert control over the population and extort them for more money. another good reason not to live in Portlandia. the same goes for gas mileage. the VW diesel was getting near 50MPG with nice performance. So the EPA does not really care about gas mileage. the requirement for and increase in fleet gas mileage is bogus as the mileage will not increase as the weight from all the required safety measures off sets physics. more weight uses more fuel getting less gas mileage. air quality has improved but where is the line between adequate and simply bureaucratic control. I think we have extend to far into the latter.

  • David Johnson

    When I got in line there were two vehicles ahead of me, a brand new Ford pickup and a brand new Chevrolet pickup both failed. I asked the service attendant why, he said that happens quite often.

  • Sum Marching On

    Sunset the oddly DEQ. Reinstate common sense in Oregon the state.

    Good start Rx, rebooting all libtards off to fighting fires en flaming all over the globe box with the Devil’s panties flaming outer in a bunch.